 |
Hangout at coffee shops,
preferably Starbucks or Caribou |
 |
Buy a pair of non-prescription
lenses if you don’t wear glasses |
 |
Cut name-brand tags off
of your clothing |
 |
Smoke clove cigarettes or
a pipe |
 |
Take a contra dancing class |
 |
Learn the difference between
coffee types |
 |
Carry around books written
in french |
 |
Hang Ansel Adams’ prints
in living room |
 |
Wear wool socks with sandals |
 |
Trade in your book bag for
a satchel |
 |
Use a fake european accent |
 |
Buy a coffee table Dali
book |
 |
Proclaim yourself agnostic |
 |
Buy a corduroy jacket with
suede elbow patches &/or a beret |
 |
Flirt with people at the
library |
 |
Hangout at campuses of colleges
you’re not attending |
 |
Buy used books because they
look read |
 |
Run new books through dryer
so they look read |
 |
Listen to NPR to keep informed |
 |
Use catch phrases in european
languages |
 |
Watch Ally McBeal, The Practice,
ER, & X-Files |
 |
Carry a thesaurus, but keep
it hidden |
 |
Listen to the Cure |
 |
Buy the best wine available
in the grocery store |
 |
Buy the Twin Peaks box set |
 |
Say you’re an out of work
writer, actor, musician, or all three |
 |
Get a poem published in
the National Library of Poetry |
 |
Answer all questions with
questions, when asked if you’re a buddhist, answer that with a question |